Own it!!!

Own it, own it, own it, it's yours so own it!

That should be a mantra women should constantly say out loud or place in beautiful frames around themselves so they can see it all the time. Everywhere we look as women, there are so many ideas of how we should look, who we should be, what we should wear that will make us look sexy and appealing, the list goes on and on. 

How about just accepting who we are; that we may not be a size 8 but we still look good as a size 16. That not all of us will have long flowing sleek hair a la hair commercial but some of us will have days when our hair may not obey a comb (naturalistas, I totally get it!). That not everyone will have natural hair and it's okay if you want to relax your hair (yes, I am going there too!). Sometimes, we just need to take a moment, stare in a mirror, accept how we look and own it. 

Why am I focussing on looks today? Because I did two things that made me think about looks. First, I created a photo using the #BornandMade page (https://www.bornandmade.com) and posted on my Instagram page (@bunmilicious). I watched the videos of other women who were owning their game and were encouraging other women to just be themselves. And second, I had to get dressed for work and was fussing about how I looked; and realised I was doing what that photo was trying to help me not do. I was focussing on how people would expect me to look instead of just dressing for me and what made me feel good. 

I actually asked God on my drive to catch my train afterwards, why do we do what I did? Why did I fuss and think I didn't look good enough because I was rocking my natural hair? And you know what His answer was? Darling, you've been sold a lie that if you don't look a particular way, you aren't good enough, pretty enough, beautiful enough. And you know what else, the media doesn't help. Women themselves don't help. Instead of encouraging each other to be uniquely themselves, they compare and compete instead, tear down and sell the wrong message. 

So beautifully made ladies, own your beauty. Own your style. Own your gift. Own that kinky or coily hair. Own that sleek hair. Own that scar that makes you unique (I have a scar on my face that for a long time I thought was ugly and detracted from my beauty). Own that waistline that may not as slim as you want it. Own those hips that you may think are too big. Own those skinny legs. Own everything that makes you uniquely you! The world will thank you for it (in time) 

And if you are a guy reading this, please encourage the women in your life. They need to hear it from you too. 

Lots of love, 

Bunmi 

(Made with Love, Grace and Mercy) 

What do you see?

Dusting off the cobwebs on my page, sweeping out the crickets and dead spiders, lighting my oil burner to refresh the stale smell that no blogging for more than 18 months has done..... 😂, you get the point.

Who would have thought it would take this long to blog again? Jeez! Bunmi, you definitely dropped the ball on this one, oya...turn to the wall, put up your hands and close your eyes (if you are Nigerian, that should bring back memories of how your parents disciplined you).

So why start now? Better late than never eh? Before Google decides to close the page for non-activity 😜 Actually, more because it has been on my mind for a while and now, one young lady will make my life a misery if I don't follow through (you know yourself 😏).

You are probably wondering what's with the title? Well, I thought it was easier than 'the vision'. That just sounds very spirikoko (overly religious). As my pastor says, I don't do religion, just relationship 😉

I am a firm believer in what you see matters. Why? Because what you see enters into your life. What enters into your life then enters into your heart. Your heart determines your output and that ultimately determines your life (thank you Pastor Sam Adeyemi, I have never forgotten). Even the bible says 'keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life - Proverbs 4:23'.

So what are you looking at? What can you see? Habakkuk 2:2-3 talks about writing the vision so he who sees it will run with it. You know in this new age, we are all about vision boards. Some people think it's cool, it makes you very with it, some people will claim they started it....well sorry to burst your bubble, it wasn't just invented today, remember that scripture in Habbakuk? It's one of many by the best vision board producer 😏. Do you know why people are big on vision boards? Because it gives you something visual that you can keep referring to, especially when things might be going slightly off kilter.

So for a long time, I was trusting God to get married. Yes, for me it was a long time 😜. And I remember being this woman who would have mood swings with God about marriage; one day I was totally God focussed and confessing every 5 seconds, then next, I couldn't even be bothered to ask for a toaster talk less of the husband. And then I had a dream (no, not a Martin Luther King style one *rolls eyes*). I mean a proper dream that involved marriage and I woke up half way through because at that time, I hadn't learnt the use of that do not disturb function on my phone 😡. Anyways, long story short, I dreamt the same dream twice (yes! Things like that do happen!)

You would think with getting the same dream twice, I would write it down so that I didn't forget and most importantly, so I could use it to harass God when the dream was taking a while to manifest.....no o, Olubunmi took 5 months, yes, 5 months to write it. But you know what, because it was of God, I remembered every detail down to what fabric I was wearing.

Fast forward YEARS later, I am going through my journal and I see the vision; one of the many times that I have seen it in those years and this time, I smile 😊. Why? Because the 'vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end, it will speak and it will not lie. Though it tarried wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry'.

So what do you see?